


He's a Half-Blood SOMETHING, Alright

by RunRabbitRun



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Thor (2011)
Genre: Crack, Crack Pairing, Crossover, Gen, WTF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-03
Updated: 2011-12-03
Packaged: 2017-10-26 19:52:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/287224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RunRabbitRun/pseuds/RunRabbitRun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki, uh, <i>got around</i> back in the day.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Loki is a Slut

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, this was for the Harry Potter crossover fest they had over at Norsekink. I take no responsibility.

"Huh, you take after your mother, I suppose. Oh well."

Severus opened his eyes, the pain of half a dozen snakebites fading far too quickly.

The tall, slender man wearing the green cloak and horned helm hauled him to his feet. Severus gaped at the man, the hall, the golden... everything.

The man took in Severus's awe with a sly smile.

"You get used to it. Now, come along, my son. Your uncle," here he rolled his eyes "Is desperate to meet you."

\---

"You did get around in your younger days, didn't you?" Sif sighed. At her left hand, her stepson Severus continued to choke on his mead. She thumped his back.

"I was acting out," said Loki, shrugging and guiding his rather shellshocked second-born son to a seat. Harry seemed a little dazed, and who could blame him? Being restored to your own living, 25-year-old body after DEFINITELY having died at the respectable age of 130 was a bit surprising. Being transported to an extra-dimensional realm and being told you were actually the product of your mother's drunken dalliances with a Norse God was a bit of thing to digest as well.

"Severus," scolded Loki once he got Harry settled and caught sight of Severus's shocked expression, "Quit gawping and say hello to your little brother."

\---

 

"This is getting ridiculous," Severus groaned into his hands. Harry had to agree.

"I was sowing my wild oats! It was perfectly acceptable at the time, alright?" snapped Loki. Sif snorted and looked up from polishing her shield.

"It was acceptable to a point, Loki. You were just a slut," she corrected.

Luna Lokisdottir (formerly Lovegood) smiled dreamily and continued to browse Loki's collection of spellbooks.

\---

Down in the courtyard, Sif corrected Neville's stance and grip on his sword. They sparred daily, and while Sif had yet bested her son every time, he was visibly improving.

Up on the balcony, overlooking this tender mother/son scene, Loki pointed and exclaimed,

"See! See! I wasn't the only one getting friendly with the locals!"

"Dad, could you please not talk about your sex life in front of me?" Harry begged.


	2. Bloody Killy Funtimes with Uncle Thor

"A hit! A fine hit, Hogun!" roared Thor as the doe stumbled and fell dead, a long arrow stuck through her throat.

Severus shifted uncomfortably on his chestnut mare and averted his eyes as Thor scooped up the deer and threw it over his shoulder.

"Come, nephews!" he said, his grin wide and charming "You must observe Hogun and I clean this kill for supper. A man cannot live as long as you both have without learning this."

Across the clearing, Harry, on his own Blue Roan, met Severus's eyes and glanced away quickly.

"Uncle Thor," he said loudly, "You can show me. Sna- Severus has to head back to camp."

"Ah, well, that is too bad. Come Harry, more fun for us." Thor then bounded off into the woods with Hogun, their horses ambling along in pursuit. Harry spared a glance at Severus before riding after them.

Severus stared after them for a moment before he leaned forward to stroke Lily's mane and clicked his tongue at her. The mare snorted and turned to clip back to the campsite.


End file.
